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Witty quotes and sayings

If it weren’t for the last minute, nothing would get done. – Anonymous

What does not kill me makes me stronger. – Goethe

Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other. – Ann Landers

If one has not given everything, one has given nothing. – Georges Guynemer

If you choose not to decide – you still have made a choice! – Neil Peart

Isn’t it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists? – Kelvin Throop

The best way to succeed in life is to act on the advice we give to others. – Anonymous

The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about. – Oscar Wilde

Seventy percent of success in life is showing up. – Woody Allen

If you can’t convince them, confuse them. – Harry S Truman

It usually takes a long time to find a shorter way. – Anonymous

Every man is the architect of his own fortune. – Appius Claudius

The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot. – Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens)

There are no rules here – we’re trying to accomplish something. – Thomas A. Edison

Never argue with a fool. Someone watching may not be able to tell the difference. – Anonymous

If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to. – G. K. Chesterton, Dorothy Parker

Nothing endures but change. – Heraclitus

True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing. – Socrates

All jobs are easy to the person who doesn’t have to do them. – Holt’s Law

Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness. - Chinese proverb

It’s better to be quotable than to be honest. – Tom Stoppard

A free society is a place where it’s safe to be unpopular. – Adlai Stevenson

The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits. – Anonymous

The quality of an organization can never exceed the quality of the minds that make it up. – Harold R. McAlindon

Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance. – Will Durant

Good people are good because they’ve come to wisdom through failure. – William Saroyan

With stupidity the gods themselves struggle in vain. – Friedrich von Schiller

No man’s knowledge here can go beyond his experience. – John Locke

The first rule to tinkering is to save all the parts. – Paul Erlich

Wine is bottled poetry. – Robert Louis Stevenson

He who cannot agree with his enemies is controlled by them. – Chinese proverb

“Reality” is the only word in the English language that should always be used in quotes. – Anonymous

I think; therefore I am. – Rene Descartes

It is the province of knowledge to speak and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen. – Oliver Wendell Holmes

I disapprove of what you say, but will defend to the death your right to say it. – Voltaire

The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided. – Casey Stengal

A picture is worth a thousand words is not an old proverb. – 1921 ad copy by Fred R Barnard

Wretched the man whose fame makes his misfortunes famous. – Lucius Accius

‘Tis better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than open one’s mouth and remove all doubt. - Samuel Johnson

Necessity is the mother of invention. – Plato

Wine gives courage and makes men more apt for passion. – Ovid

‘Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. – Alfred Lord Tennyson

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with. – W. C. Fields

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